There is a time and place for humility but it’s also acceptable to own your greatness [gracefully, of course].
WHAT IS HUMILITY?
A quick search of Google and you’ll find that humility is defined as “A modest or low view of one’s own importance; humbleness.”
And, I understand that it is necessary to keep the ego in check; however, I’d also argue that it’s okay to accept that you are great at something and to be rewarded for it, without needing to diminish what you’ve accomplished to make others feel comfortable.
Let me explain.
HUMILITY CAN BE A DIMINISHING METHOD
There was a time when I didn’t talk about my education accomplishments, work accomplishments, or business accomplishments because I thought I’d be perceived as bragging. You too?
To this end, I’ve also witnessed people receive awards and compliments unexpectedly and instead of saying thank you and enjoying the accolade or acknowledgment, they’d say things like “no big deal”(diminishing) or “I don’t deserve this” (not accepting).
I’d offer to you that these thoughts and actions can be seen as acts of humility; however, what’s wrong with standing in your greatness and saying “thank you”?
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- Thank you for recognizing my efforts and hard work.
- Thank you for noticing my consistency and perseverance.
- Thank you for the compliment.
It’s been my experience that women exhibit this trait more often than men but I think in an effort to not shine too bright, we’ve all had instances where we chose to shrink.
“We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do.” – Marianne Williamson
We shrink because we don’t want our friends, family or peers to feel uncomfortable or insecure. Yet it’s unavoidable that in pointing out what we’ve accomplished, we inadvertently point out what others haven’t accomplished. BUT we show that it’s possible.
One of my favorites athletes is Simone Biles and there is no doubt in my mind she is the greatest of all time in gymnastics. Each time she shined her light and excelled she showed the world things they didn’t even know was possible. When they crowned her with medals, she didn’t say “I don’t deserve this”; she accepted – gracefully.
HOW TO STOP PLAYING SMALL
So. Next time, someone tells you how beautiful you are, how your thoughtfulness impacted their life, or how great you are at something, do yourself a favor and say “thank you”, you are worthy and deserving of the moment.
Besides, your decision to shrink and blame it on humility can be invalidating to those who chose you.
Aja Edmond elegantly writes “…nothing is more demotivating (and perhaps disingenuous) than a talented person acting like they aren’t, especially when people tell them they are. It diminishes them and is invalidating to those [who] offer the compliments.” -Everesee
And for all the times you don’t get acknowledged publicly, thank yourself privately because you are important and how you show up in the world is a reflection of your opinion of yourself.
YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENTS CAN BE A GUIDING LIGHT
When I began telling people about my accomplishments, I got questions and an opportunity to share exactly how I achieved them:
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- Want to go to college? Great. I started my collegiate education at the community college and value that experience.
- Want to be a scientist? After I earned my A.S degree, I went to a university and earned a degree in biology, psychology, and minored in chemistry. This education was what led me to qualify for science industry positions.
- Want to start an online business? Okay. You can do that too. Build a website, create content, learn how to give your readers value.
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There is wealth in our experiences and there are people who want and need to know how you got to where you are today. Don’t let humility stop you from sharing your journey.
Your decision to shine may be the light that someone else needs to know that the seemingly impossible is possible for someone like themselves.
WHAT THE BIBLE TELLS US ABOUT HUMILITY
I know people who believe in God will shout that The Word says that we should be humble. To those people, I direct you to 1 Peter 5:6 NIV “Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.”
My understanding of this passage and others that speak of humility is that we shouldn’t walk around proud, unwilling to listen to wisdom from our peers, or full of our own self-worth such that we think we are better than…anyone.
However, The Bible also reads “Let someone else praise you, and not your own mouth; an outsider, and not your own lips.” Proverbs 27:2
Let some else praise you. 😉 Need I write anymore?
ACTIONABLE STEP:
So. Please practice humility appropriately {do not act like you’re better than anyone, give credit where credit is due, and be available to new learning experiences} but also decide to shine brighter than you’ve ever had. Start today.
ME: You are exceptional, beautiful, and worthy of kindness.
YOU: {Enter your response in the comment section below}
